I learned something about myself today. It’s easier for me to be productive when i see evidence of other people being productive.

This entire day I have not been able to be productive no matter how hard I try. See I’m in Chemistry and if there’s anything I’ll remember from this class is polarity.

The basic idea is an atom is formed a certain and each parts of it have a driving force. If an atom has its pieces all positive and pointing basically the same way, there’s movement. If the atom has its pieces that are negative, it still pulls the same way in the negative direction. But if the pieces are all pulling in different locations, the atom becomes nonpolar and doesn’t move since the forces are cancelling each other out. Now despite me answering this in class and being embarrassed because supposedly I got the answer the professor was saying wrong shattering my confidence thinking that this is the one thing I knew and really understood from this class, this concept still helps me.

I have a lot on my mind. Work, Drawing, Taking care of my house, classes, finding a more steady job, practicing 3D, being social, taking care of my dogs, making the text game, keeping in shape, coming up with rent, staying healthy, staying happy, etc.  

Well all of those things are pieces of me and if I let all of those things consume my mind, I become nonpolar.  I sit still and don’t do anything. I don’t want to draw because I know I have work to do and I don’t want to work because I would rather be having fun and I don’t want to have fun because I need to study. You get it. 

What I learned to do (and I hope this helps in the future) is clear my mind of things not related to what I hope to achieve. I’m up at 11 finally working calmly on my stuff (work related not drawing) because I’m feeling my attention with productiveness. I’m currently watching behind the scenes footage from The 4 Hobbit Movies and it’s honestly amazing how watching other people be productive and talk about their stories helps you concentrate one what you’re doing. I’m more inspired by the process of finishing something rather than the finished product. I mean come on we know The Hobbit movies weren’t that great. But just seeing their blog and updates in video format really moves me.