divinedorothy:

divinedorothy:

i’ve never played d&d but i know i would try to fuck everything

“You enter a tavern. A buxom maid offers you a drink”

“I fuck the buxom maid.”

“You enter the den of an angry barbarian king”

“I calm him by sucking his dick”

“You come across a giant”

“I distract him with a sensual strip tease”

“You can’t do this with everything we come across”

“I put my hand on the DM’s thigh bc im having fun and i know what i’m doing”